Six

At 11:58pm on the 22nd of May, 2009 Anna delivered an 8 lb 12 oz baby girl. As always, she did amazing. No hurling of profanities or objects. No ear splitting screams. Mother and baby are healthy and well. For two days this little thing was referred to by the nursing staff as 'Six' because we didn't have a name for her. Saturday morning at breakfast I asked the kids if they thought it was a boy or a girl. Before any real fights broke out I had Clara read my hospital bracelet.

She was the most excited for a baby sister.

The rest of the crew was pretty excited as well. Even William and James.





After careful deliberation, we decided that she looked like she could provide road side assistance or maybe generate energy for small electric devices, so we named her. . .

Audrey Anna Allen And we feel very blessed to have her be a part of our family. She has a welcome quiet and sweet disposition. Thank you all for being so interested.

Bike rides and baby names

While we were out doing yard work a few days ago little Megs thought it would be fun to take her brother for a ride. So she hooked up the bike trailer to ... herself, and dragged him around the block.She was a little worried that her "real" bike, the one with training wheels, would fall over with all that weight, so she opted for her old bike and belt loop, helmet and all, just in case.Wish I had a video to attach because it looked so odd and hilarious, with William in the back yelling, "Faster, faster!" and Clara's legs spinning in furious little circles.

Update: No baby. This little creature is apparently having too much fun in it's warm cuddly cocoon. Too bad the sentiment is not requited. But, since we have the time, Mikey and I have been talking about names. Does anybody out there have any good suggestions? Boy and girl? First and middle? You might just get a prize (like our unfailing gratitude) if you suggest the winning name!

Mascara

Overdue

"Hey, so I called at about 2 am and nobody answered, so I figured you were probably having the BABY."

"You look like you're going to pop." / "You don't look big enough to be 10 months pregnant, ha-ha!"

"Have you tried eating some really spicey Chinese food, then walking? Worked for my grandma."

"When are you going to have that BABY? Weren't you due, like, two hours ago?"

"So are you going to get that BABY induced, because you look really swollen and uncomfortable."

"Have you tried walking backwards? That worked for my great-aunt."

"Haven't you tried castor oil yet? I mean, it makes you feel like you want to die, but it's worth it if it gets the baby out..."

"You're not lifting that, are you? Didn't you know that if you lift anything it will wrap the umbilical cord around the baby's neck and strangle it? I mean, I'm just saying..."

"And you should probably get your membranes stripped, because you've got to get things all "cleaned out" up there. And I heard from a friend of a second cousin of a bat that her baby was overdue, and it came out with fangs. Like the "egg tooth" gone wild - so you probably want to get that out as soon as possible. Cuz I'm a 19-year old nincompoop, and I know everything about BABIES."

And my favorite was when a very old lady approached me in church and started giving advice on what sorts of foreplay induce labor. I acted like I didn't know what she was talking about just to force her to specify. She squirmed and I enjoyed it.

P. S. For all interested: I am now 1 week overdue, and I'm not in labor. And I lift things all the time.

Davis Divas

By some miracle, aligned stars, or the cosmos smiling down on us, all of my sisters (Miriam, Bethany, Kathryn, Liz, and Rivka), my mom and I were able to clear our schedules and come up with child care in order to take a much needed holiday all together. Destination? Davis, CA to visit Grandma Mikkelsen, where else? And it just so happened that the only weekend we all had free from February to May was over my three-decade birthday/Easter Sunday. The festivities started Thursday night when all the girls, minus Rivka who flew into Sacramento from BYU, came to spend the night. Mom took a quick trip to Michael's office for some treatment, then they all crashed in the honeymoon suite, aka Clara's bedroom (complete with pink wallpaper and crimson carpet. You're all invited to come experience the honeymoon suite for yourselves, by the way. Bring your sweetheart and some earplugs.) Then we stealthily escaped before dawn on Friday to head south. Never a better time was had by 8 girls!Above is us arriving at the "corner." It is tradition since I was a little teeny weeny thing that right at the corner of Grandma's and Grandpa's block my dad would announce that this trip was just taking too long, he was going to turn around now and go home. We'd all scream in protest and pour out the doors to run the rest of the way. So at the corner Miriam claimed she was tired of driving and was pretty sure she'd forgotten her dental floss, so we were going home. We all screamed and jumped from the car. The dog-walkers down the street looked confused as a car full of 20's-30's (and 50's) women jumped out screaming and started running down the street. Bees nest? Now that I look at us, we weren't pretty. Bep and I kind of look like waddling little trolls in this one. We went for walks in town and at the Davis arboretum which is a favorite place. (Bep and Liz are being true Davis Divas, which, by the way, was the title of our trip....)We gave each other back rubs and pedicures. (Kathryn and Rivka exfoliating below.) I took advantage of at least one of my birthday presents. This one was from Rivka:We watched movies and tried our hands at beading at a local shop. Below, Liz and Miriam are concentrating on their various works of art. I was actually quite impressed by some of the jewelry these girls created. Kathryn and I made presents for our girls, Miriam a pirate necklace for her son, Captain Jack, among other things.Grandma and I played crazy duets, which is one of my favorite things to do with her. Then Grandma played old favorites while we sang (Bethany in her perfectly imitated Barbara Streisand voice).We slept in, and when we did wake up we didn't get up.  Below, Miriam and me are sweetly admiring each other's growing bellies. Me and ma' mammy at the arboretum.We stopped in the name of love. Below I'm wearing my "party pants" that Bep gave me for my birthday. So comfortable, and SO stylish!

On Sunday morning people started creeping into my/Miriam's room to wish me happy birthday. The best was when a sleepy Kathryn poked her head in to see if I was asleep. When she saw I was awake she spiked a bright orange balloon through the door whispering the happy birthday song to me. Below she and I are playing volleyball with the balloon while we jump on the beds. Sorry, Grandma.After church that morning we came home and had a delicious ham and potatoes Easter dinner. Took a brief snooze, then the birthday celebration took place. It began when I heard violent mob knocking on the door of the lou as I washed my hands. I opened it, and ...

...the human tunnel, with a token spank from each person as I went through. I was escorted to the dining room where I was given my birthday crown made by Mom and crazy decorations by everyone else. My birthday cake was strawberry meringue, my VERY favorite, with one candle for each decade! Wow, thirty sounds old.We had a grand time. The very best birthday present was from my husband and all my bros/bros-in-laws who were willing to be single parents for a weekend, to do Easter without their ladies, and skip a little work (where applicable). My thanks to each of you sisters, Mom and Grandma for being so much fun, for the gifts, and mostly for all being women that I look up to for your goodness, intelligence and real beauty.My parting wisdom is actually an old Confucism:

What Color Are You?

So my sister lent me this book about personality colors. Let's just say, it was most intriguing. Probably the most remarkable thing about it was that Michael was interested too. He read the whole thing.

I am a Yellow. What is a Yellow? Here are some of the descriptions: happy, fun, uncommitted, irresponsible, enthusiastic, obnoxious, carefree, disorganized and incomplete, impulsive, charismatic, naive and trusting, a flippant chatterbox. "Happy is as happy does. Yellow people love themselves because they know exactly what they love to do and always find the time and resources to do it." In a nutshell, I'm happy and really annoying about it. My secondary color, about 30%, was White. They are the peacemakers. Ah, yes. That's me.

Now comes the "relationship" aspect. Michael is completely opposite. He took the test and is nearly split down the middle Blue/Red (slightly more Blue). Here's what it says about Blues: committed, perfectionistic, highly demanding, self-disciplined, sacrificing, unforgiving, worried, guilty, sincere, purposeful and dedicated, insecure, complex. "Life cannot bestow on anyone a more gratifying reward than the sincere appreciation and trust of a Blue friend, employer, or family member"...the trouble is getting their appreciation and trust. Reds are the tenacious people who keep the world turning so that the Yellows can have their fun.

Of those specific combinations it says, "Blues with strong Red secondary experience the most difficult internal struggles. They are also typically the most resourceful of personalities." I'll happily take that. "People with strong Yellow and White blends enjoy developed people skills. If you can't enjoy them, consider yourself the one with the problem." Finally, someone said what I've been thinking my WHOLE life! I'm going to have that printed on a shirt...or maybe 10 of them.

Mikey was reading The Color Code one night while I was watching something on TV. At one point he looked over at me, looked back at the book, looked over at me, put his arm around my shoulder and said, "Hey, You. What did you do that was fun today?" I laughed. In over 10 years of marriage he's never asked me that question. Every day is some variation of it, how was your day, what did you do today, etc. But never that approach. I appreciated it.

So if you ever need an interesting book to read, try The Color Code by Taylor Hartman. And if you're ever bewildered by your creepy spouse, just remember she may be a Yellow, or he may just be purple. Give 'em a break!

Genius

Jacob: "Mom, isn't Clara smart? She made it so she can smell her favorite candle anywhere she goes!"

Death of a Chick

Translation of top message found on the outside of an envelope, for those of you who don't read sobbing 5-yr old: "Sad conversation [contained inside]. Love, Clara, Jacob, Isaac, William"

Obviously tragedy struck the other day. As I worked away on the chicken coop, Jacob came running into the garage with Will's beloved chickie, Baby. Somehow she had broken her neck and was feebly trying to escape her impending doom. Within a few seconds she was dead.

The kids all sat in a circle around Baby and talked about memories they had with her as they wiped their eyes. Will pointed out that Baby especially loved him because she was yellow when we got her, which used to be his favorite color. Then he changed it to black, and Baby heard him so she started growing some black and white feathers. Jacob, ever the advocate for justice, was determined to get to the bottom of who exactly stepped on her. After some heated debate, William interrupted, saying, "Jacob, it doesn't matter who stepped on her because I'm not going to take their chicken. I'll just pick a new one."

Then Clara immediately went inside to write a note to Michael (above) then called him so he could come home to comfort her. He came home immediately. Jacob found a shovel. Isaac fetched some toilet paper (after all, that's what they wrap mummies with). Will caressed his dead bird until funeral arrangements were completed. James walked around wondering why everyone was crying.

Funeral was performed, prayer said, flowers planted on grave, Baby feathers lashed to sticks "so we'd always know where she is," lamentations expressed, along with assurances by each child that Baby was in heaven now. My favorite was when Isaac said, "Mom, I'm sure that Baby's gone to heaven because she wasn't even eight yet and she was a good little chickie. But what about Grandma?" Obviously someone needed a refresher for the conversation we had around Great Grandma N.'s funeral. Never hurts.

Poor Grandma Allen had the bad luck of calling shortly after all of this. I was up to the elbows in dough, so weepy Clara answered the phone. "Grandma, I'm sorry to have to tell you this. We've all been crying all afternoon. You'll never guess. Baby died. She's dead and we're all so sad about it. Nope, Mom can't come to the phone. No, Dad's taking Jacob to baseball. We just can't believe it..." I rushed to clean off my hands so I could set the record straight as Meg proceeded with details about how she'd probably been stepped on and was now buried amongst the flowers, while her spirit watched us from heaven wondering why we stepped on her... Grandma was saavy enough to figure things out by the time I got her, so no harm done, minus an extremely increased heart rate for a few moments.

Poor Baby. May she rest in peace.

Band-aid Deluxe

"William, would you please stop picking at that scratch on your forehead?"

"No, Mom. I don't like scabbies so I have to get it off!"

"Well, if you can't leave it alone go find a band-aid to cover it with."

"Oh, good idea, Mom."

Later: "Will, what's on your head?"

"My band-aid. Like it?" (Made of postage stamp border, a gem and tape.)

"That's the fanciest band-aid I've ever seen."

"Yep. Clara says it's deluxe!" He wore it for three days.

And while I'm at it, the sun peeked out for a moment this morning so I took some pictures of our yard from our kitchenette windows. I love this time of year when everything goes from drab and dormant to life and vibrance all at once. Below is the larger of two "tulip trees" which are next to each other, making a huge explosion of purplish pink. They are the kids' favorite climbing trees.

I wonder sometimes how we were so fortunate to be able to plant ourselves in such a beautiful corner of the world. Another place that caused me to feel that way was Iowa in the fall. Breathtaking.

The Singing Nudist

Unfettered by social propriety, little James Grey, fresh out of the bath, sat at my messy desk and sang his heart out to the mini Children's Songbook. I think he had sung almost every song in the book since he'd been at it for a while before I came onto the scene with my camera. What would we do without this little bowl of sunshine?

(I am sorry it's so dark because his little puckered face in the mirror is especially charming. For you techies out there, is there any way to lighten videos?)

Chickens

It is with great enthusiasm that we announce some new additions to our little suburban homestead: Chickens! What an ordeal jumping through the hoops to secure a livestock permit and finally get them. We were required to obtain the signatures of all residents within 200 feet of our property (the sheer number made me feel claustrophobic!). One old man refused saying he didn't want to buy any chickens. I patiently explained that he didn't have to, just we were getting chickens. He said he didn't want us to have roosters. I assured him that I didn't either. "Nope. I'm not gonna sign nothin'! First you say your just gettin' chickens, then you get roosters, then come the skunks..." So I kicked him in the shins, and left. Actually, I thanked him for his time, and escorted Jacob back to the car. Whereupon Jake announced to all his siblings that we couldn't get chickens because of that mean old man. Weeping and wailing broke out amongst the masses until I told everybody that if they weren't quiet I wouldn't sign either. Silence.

We went back to the police station, where I sweet talked the police chief into seeing things my way, "...and besides, his house is ever so far from our's. He didn't seem to understand anything I was saying. I'm not sure it's quite fair..." So he "double-checked" the footage, and determined that his house was indeed just beyond what was necessary. Thank you very much! A little morning field trip to the feed store, and we're on our way! Below is the picture of contentedness. Someone else is excited for our new friends...Seamus the devil cat has been faithfully keeping an eye on these little chicks, hoping that some day one might stray from its tupperware... Thanks, Mom and Lizzie, for visiting and participating whole-heartedly in the chickie festivities. Now all we have to do is research how to build a coop then build it. Pictures of that to come.